C for compliments, C for confessions… C for crap!

There’s one more word starting with C, but I would prefer decency over that. This post is dedicated to the recent trends of the confession and compliment pages on Facebook.

Remember the old times when there were no sophisticated means of communication. People used to sing songs and send letters via pigeons (or at least that’s what we saw in movies). That time when someone felt like complimenting the other person, he/she would write that in the letter… or kiss it pink maybe.
Then came the modern time when we have phones, emails and what not. And the best part in my opinion is the vehicles which allow us to travel and meet the person and say things right to their face. Still there are things that embarrass the hell out of us or make us shy (in short, love stuff). So for that, there used to be churches where you could confess to the priest.

And then there’s all those weird radio programs where a super melodious RJ will not only listen to you in a night show with a mushy name (let’s say, raat baki baat baki), but pretend to be the love guru and solve your problems too.

The question is, were these not enough? Now what the FB timeline is filled of? NIT Confessions, IIT Confessions… and when that wasn’t enough, LNMIIT and JNIT confessions. What next? Swami Barkhanand Gokhle Institute of Dhaba Management Confessions?


Slappin Batman - i confess that shut up

And that’s not it, there’s ‘compliments’ too. The idea is, if you’re too shy of complimenting someone, just say it anonymously and we’ll post it. This way, the person who is being complemented becomes a hero. And the compliment giver doesn’t realize that since the taker doesn’t even know who gave it, he/she just made a big fool out of him/herself.

If I had this much time to waste (actually I pretend I don’t), I’d rather make a page for rating the photos on the scale of their hotness. Who knows the idea might just sell well. (No, it’s my idea. Your argument is invalid).

Coming back to the cr… confessions and compliments. First the major institutes will make such pages. Then individual college pages will be made. And then maybe we’ll start making a fan page for every freaking hostel room.
First the confession would be for IIT Confessions page. “I liked this hot girl and I proposed her friend just to stay close to her.”
Then there will be a particular IIT Delhi confession page status. “I liked this hot girl and i…” before it’s even posted, the admin will think, wait… hot girl… in IITD… man this guy is lying!
Then IITD, Jwalamukhi Hostel confessions page. “I broke the water supply coz I didn’t feel like bathing and didn’t want to feel left out by seeing others bathing.”
And at last, IITD, Jwalamukhi, Room number xxx confession. “ Dude! I was the one who stole your red underwear.”

IIT D guys need not take an offence, they can replace that with the iit they hate the most or maybe any NIT and read back. 😛

Futurama Fry - not sure if these complement pages are actually working or j
Point is, while these pages are lame and probably ideated by people who were themselves either too scared to say and face the truth or kind enough to help others get out of their misery, they are kind of fun as well.

This is how:

  • You can almost most of the times guess who is the person making the confession on your college page.
  • You can post fake confessions and create a ruckus. (The nasty ones 😀  )
  • You can post a fake lovy dovy compliment for the lamest guy around you and get it published and then make it go viral. And once the guy is done bragging, reveal the reality.
  • Make fake profiles, get yourself some compliments!
  • Ever made a to-do list with weird things that remained incomplete? What’s a big deal in confessing you did them?
  • Best one: Confess that you bribed a teacher. Once the confession gets liked and shared, act like your conscious suddenly woke up and you want to bring that evil teacher in the open and name the one professor you hate like hell.
  • Confess on your status that you were the real admin of the confessions page and the current admin tricked you in making him the admin and kicked you out. And now he is posting wrong things about the college. DEMAND your admin status back!
  • Compliment your girlfriend with a hundred different guy profiles. Once she is noticed, you become the dude. (She is your girlfriend after all). Double benefit, even she’d like that (Unless she knows the real motive).

Personally, my favorite confession was this.

“#6 Nikita
you have curvy figure…, but only problem is your Mustache. Please wax it up for me. 😦 

True, honest… and well… hilarious, isn’t it?

Two kinds of people wouldn’t have understood half of this post. Those who have no idea what compliment and confession pages I am talking about. And those who actually made those pages.

In case you belong to former category, here are a few examples for you.

And in case you’re in the latter, I know how badly you’re itching to put an offensive comment here. Go ahead, I’d love that. I have heard that hated posts go viral these days! 😀

Next month, next post. Looking for a co-author since I will be out of town and won’t get much time to write. Do write to me if you have an idea. 🙂

10 thoughts on “C for compliments, C for confessions… C for crap!

  1. I’ll compliment this confession – “I broke the water supply coz I didn’t feel like bathing and didn’t want to feel left out by seeing others bathing.” 😛
    What a current topic to raid on. Good one! 😀

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